it's amazing how so many people become co-dependent of their significant other and lose complete sight of who they were before. why is it that in the progression of an 'us' the individual always has to give up a certain measure of their sense of self?
when we are attracted to somebody, aren't we attracted to the essence of who they are? their true individuality? why is it that so many of us try so hard to change the other person after some time. almost wanting to close them in, keep them on a real tight leash, as if we are afraid they might go away. but isn't it true that the more one loses it's freedom, the more one feels the bondage, and the more one would desire to flee far, far away? so in wanting to keep them close, you are actually pushing them to run away. when someone feels caged in, suffocated, they want to flee to greener pastures.
some people think i'm strange because i like my independence and my alone time. they think it's weird that i don't want to be with that particular person 24/7, call them on the phone every 5 seconds, and have them do the same. but if you don't have time to reflect, to hear your own thoughts every once in a while, how are you suppose to be able to sustain an 'us'? and be a part of a relationship?
when people start acting needy and clingy, i want to gradually separate myself away from them. slowly but surely because i feel like they are draining the life out of me.
but hey! may be i am strange, and weird...who knows?
freedom is one the most basic human necessities! everybody desires freedom in some form or another.
not cutting off someone's independence, is showing them that you respect their freedom, you respect them. and in turn they will respect you too. and at the heart of it all, it will be easy to trust and not question. as it will be easy to not want to possess; because people are people not things to be owned.
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